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In this episode of The TruthSeekah Podcast TruthSeekah speaks with Matt Morris about Authenticity, Vulnerability and how to live in the present moment. Matt Morris shares his story of a plane crash where he lost his mother and was left severely handicapped. Matt explains how he was made fun of at school because the crash left him with damaged legs that made it hard to walk so he often walked with a limp. Fighting depression, fear and anxiety for the majority of his life and Matt overcame these obstacles by facing them straight on. There is power when we begin to own up to the person that we are, complete with all of our flaws and all. The act of being authentic and vulnerable is more powerful than we know. Many people have to wear masks to fit into different roles within their life oftentimes acting as if the roles are not connected. When we take off the mask and lay aside the facade that we are protected by the masks we wear we will find that we live in a word of opportunity where it is okay to be unique. As we embrace our own uniqueness and wear it as a badge of honor rather than shame, only then will we know the power of being authentic. We are not here to perform or to beg for acceptance, we are simply mirrors of the love and grace that we have been shown from our Creator. As we embrace our story, the good and the bad we will begin to naturally offer hope to those still stuck within the performance based lifestyle that teaches that we must earn love. We are love and we are loved for being uniquely the person that God created us to be, with all of our flaws and all.


– How to Live in the Present Moment: Let Go of the Past & Stop Worrying About the Future:

– Unzip Your Pants: How to Be Vulnerable in a F*cked Up World:



View Text Transcript

well about living in the present moment has changed so many lives like letting go in the past and stop worrying so much about the future so so that was key that was key my my my transformation and then just recently an update of where I’m now I was actually facing a last summer what happened was yeah as you guys probably know the lead lead singer of Linkin Park so it gives own life last July which was really really traumatic for me because this guy we’re band basically saved my life when I was like 18 or 19 years old I felt like you know the music rogue because I really connected with it but he took his life so I got into another state of depression for about a month month and a half and I didn’t share with anybody I told nobody what was going on inside my head cuz like at this point I was always seen as the positive guy the guy that always no super optimistic I couldn’t show my vulnerable side I could ensure that I’m actually sad but I’m actually hurting inside I couldn’t show that I didn’t want to be for anybody pretty to be perceived me as that so what I did though yeah I began to feel these depressions and I was really conscious of it I was like I felt like a dark cloud was hovering over my head that just wouldn’t go away you know it felt like I was trapped inside my body like paralyzed and stuck I was unmotivated to do anything so at this point I was like I can’t stay like this I’m did a nothing done this is this is really a sick feeling and I feel like I can’t stay this way so I so I had I heard about vulnerability from a lady named brené Brown she was a really amazing tedx her name is Bernie Brown and I was like you know what I’m just gonna open up to my wife totally like but I really feel depressed I didn’t I didn’t want to I didn’t want to bother with my problems I didn’t want to let her know about the old news that chester bennington died and people feeding it over and over and over and over I felt like that but really the reality is that that’s the answer that’s what I needed to do I needed to open up and then so that’s what I did I started talking to her I’m like I feel really depressed and I’ve been down for a while you know cuz his death is still hurting me I’m still really down about the fact that he took his own life so I opened up to her and again the cloud began to fade away I talked to her about it she was like well she’s glad I shed some tears that’s really really sad and then I began to open up the more people opened up to my best friend I opened up to my sister about what I was feeling inside I did a Facebook live about what happened to me and my traumatic experience about how I was afraid of sharing with anybody that I was in a plane crash they want to be looked at as different but I want to be seen as not good enough so and then I began to also share about how I was feeling a the loss of chester bennington his suicide so I what I realized was that actually being vulnerable and talking about your emotions it’s a sign of strength really the ability to do that takes a lot of courage so I know as a boy growing up I was always like everyone always told me that you know just shut up and deal with your emotions by yourself no don’t don’t don’t don’t ever show yourself crying don’t ever show yourself so I never to let anybody know that you’re not feeling good that’s that’s kind of how I was so so I realized that but those little did a bunch of research the past six months actually came out with a book called the vulnerability it’s about vulnerability and opening up about it opening up to the world opening up to people you can trust people that actually loved you and wanted to see you happy people people that will listen changes your world completely so basically that’s my story in a nutshell I know it’s kind of long but that was it man yeah man give us some some background about who you are and how much some framework you know I’m saying from coming out of oppression admitting that that you’re dealing with stuff on the inside of you just hold it within like that I’m saying to try to hide it from people like that’s the big sin of the garden it’s like trying to hide it even from God I’m okay everything’s fine and everything’s falling apart around you nope I’m okay I’m okay being so it like what people talking about pursuing your dreams following your destiny and when it comes to spirituality to say fake it till you make it and don’t acknowledge the problem like act like it’s not there but it’s gonna stay there unless we deal with it right to it to admit something’s going on I know in the scriptures it says like confess your sins your burdens confess it to someone so you can find healing because if you’re hiding it it’s gonna stay there but when you confess it you speak it out you get it off of you and you kind of release it man so there’s power they have just simply acknowledging that you got something going on that you need help with you know yeah that’s a hundred percent right man and and it’s crazy because like like you’re we’re kind of training our society you know just just focus on your goals focus on moving forward no but then it if you do that you forget about the present moment which is actually the most important part I mean you also got to heal from your past but before you can actually stay in the present moment or you need to work on your past before you cannot you should actually move forward with your goals yeah because I mean this is why so many people in America are depressed like in the US one out of every 15 people are in a state of depression thinking that man that’s like that’s like seven percent of our population that’s a ton of people you know it’s so it’s so sad man and then the saddest part is that like depression is the is the most common common cause of suicide and I mean it’s crazy statistically speaking like approximately 100 123 people each day in the US take their lives and for every suicide there are 25 unsuccessful attempts man think of those numbers it’s crazy it’s good so let me ask you this so what do you do you think as that is the main cause I don’t know if there is a main cause I know there’s a lot of causes but you know people who aren’t happy you say you know if I get this I’ll be happy there’s this thing – that’s part of being in the end it pulls you out of the moment if I buy this I’ll be happy if I go here I achieved this goal then I’ll be happy and I won’t be depressed anymore or I’ll be fulfilled or I’ll stop doing drugs or whatever the case is you know then we see people successful people like Chester Bennington and Anthony Bourdain I mean the list goes on and on of celebrities who seem like they have it all together they they need for nothing but inwardly they’re fighting to keep their life man you know what I’m saying so what do you think it is is the leading cause of depression if that’s even even makes sense cuz it’s just I know so little I know so so complicated in complex idea of what causes depression but yeah man that’s a good question you know I I really as I talked about in my book I feel like the main cause of depression is a lack of connection no I know in our world it’s a digital world that we live in today everything’s you know on the everybody’s on the phone and everybody’s texting and stuff but the reality is we need a we need human connection it’s as vital as as you know food human connection is just as important as as as a nurturing mother – it’s baby it’s so important we we need other people around us who we can talk to who can you know share love with who love us who support us yeah things like and that’s that’s what I feel like the main cause of it is and I feel like a lot of these like big name I mean celebrities are just a small portion of the the suicidal population but it could be your mom dad sister brother child anybody I mean or anybody’s at risk for depression and suicide which is the sad part but the but we always hear about I like the chester bennington Bourdain the creator stayed Robin Williams these guys they feel a lack of connection I feel like I feel like if they had so many in their life who really really felt like their who they could felt like they could really talk to and connect with at a deep level like really share everything with but I feel like this we’re gonna be the case this wouldn’t be the case and I feel like because these are such big big name people they feel very alone they feel very just like they can’t talk be normal yeah normal because everybody wants something or they or they don’t know you they know the persona they know that you on TV or you from the song or whatever you know totally totally yeah they’re like yeah man oh let me have your autograph and then let’s talk yeah I mean yeah that’s what a lot of people are saying like celebrities who are like going out and you people who are in bands and stuff and somebody be like oh my god I can’t believe a shoe can I get a selfie they’ll get a selfie with him and then they’ll run off and leave and they’re ready to share it out and show people but the you know the artist of celebrity he’s waiting to have a real conversation there’s a bunch of footage of like Justin Bieber interacting with the paparazzi now like you back in the day he would you know hide his face push them fight on all kind of stuff and I was like put the camera down and let’s let’s talk no man no I got to get the shot but like this is weird what are you doing let’s have a conversation and he’s wanting to connect with this random paparazzi person or whatever the case is but they’re just like he’s not human he’s a symbol or subject you know what I’m saying yeah so this is a crazy crazy dichotomy it’s so true you know it’s like it’s like I feel like like a lot of people are afraid to say the words that I need help ya know because I think that’s the most important things like just to for me I remember my situation like I didn’t want to tell anybody about I needed to know if I wanted to do it all on my own I was like oh yeah I can do this on my own it’s not everything else by myself I can do this but the reality is no you can do it on your own you need people you need connection you need love you need support and nuts that’s that’s the problem with a lot of people out there that can’t say I need help you have to deal with it to whatever it is your face and you have to deal with it when it’s small you know there’s a bunch of scriptures and in quotes about like nipping it in the bud and not feeding it because this little you know this you know we look we look at the Bible with the the serpent figure we got this in the garden the Satan figure is a snake by the end of Revelation it’s a huge dragon that we you know you got to deal with and it’s the same way man for like the things in our lives that that is like it’s a little healthy or it killing us or whatever the case is if you don’t deal with it wanna soar early it’s gonna be a lot harder man and it could man it’s the array is open because it could be anything you like funding false dreams we talked about dealing with like the pain of the past and hurt and stuff because a lot of people want to be successful because someone told them they couldn’t be and now you’re creating this this thing you’re pursuing this career which the only reason you’re doing it is because it’s to get back at someone who said you’d never be successful doing it and that’s not what your calling is that’s not where your heart as you’re operating out of hurt so you have to deal with the soul wounds and the childhood hurts and things like that get over it before you can pursue pursue your dreams that’s really cool how you painted a picture of saying we have to go back to the past and deal with the past so that we can be in the present and be okay in the present because most I think a lot of people are not in the present because they can’t deal with themselves they can’t deal with them with their thoughts and everything that comes up so you have escapism drugs and alcohol things like that that suppress the wounds and things like that so once we deal with the the childhood hurts in the past and the forgiveness and stuff like that then we can be okay with just sitting in silence and being in that now moment right right yeah like like I mean so many studies have shown that people in the u.s. do whatever they can to avoid vulnerability but to numb out the pain now with the draw alcohol the the porn the TV the food all all types of different addictions so many people that are addicted to stop you know but but but that’s that’s really where people get trapped and then and then this gets worse and worse and it builds up like like the serpent or instance you’re dragging you know the thing is like like people who don’t feel like they can talk about their problems you know they’re more at risk for a depression and then which eventually leads as it fills up it gets worse and worse because the suicide yeah it’s had a really really bad week like I imagine or that Anthony Bourdain was having a really bad week and it but it’s depression just got so heavy yeah it was like this demon got inside his head he’s like just you know kill yourself basically really really tough so I mean the problem with that is we just isolate ourselves even more and more if we don’t feel like we can talk about it yeah there’s a you know I people getting these weird holes man and they feel like they’re alone they felt like nobody understands them they’re the only ones who feel this certain type of way they’re the only one who has ever experienced this loneliness or this trial or tribulation that they have this this you know some character flaw or like yeah if it’s a I mean I’ve heard there’s so many women on the internet and I see statuses all guys or dogs no you know there’s nobody out there for me and I wish there was a guy for me and then there’s guys who are isolator who say the same thing like I mean all the girls are this all the girls just want to go clubbing and drinking them like who these girls you’re hanging out with like I know tons of females who are looking or a partner who have very similar interests to you but you have to go out there and find them and not like approach it with a preconceived notion that this is it and and this is the way it is or it’s got to be with being in the now moment you have the power to create whatever you want to call it into existence to focus on it if that’s what you want to be present instead of being outside of yourself or I’m living in the future I’ll have a preconceived notion that every woman or is this and every guy’s a player and this and so every relationship you come into is you’re gonna approach it with a preconceived notion like dad that’s not real it’s not real at all you know that’s a really good point now because that the cool thing about the present moment is once you get him a present moment you have Noah that’s fear doesn’t exist there and the problem is like a lot of people are talking about our aid to meeting new people afraid of the fear of rejection which gay everybody has a little bit of fear of rejection it usually stems from a childhood now where they out of loving a supportive childhood versus unsupportive or you know unloving childhood you know but matters on that on the level of fear of rejection you’re half but the point is that no when you’re in the present moment if you just really focus on what I like to do with but I first started is I’m really focused on the person’s I just really looked deep into the person’s eyes and we really connect with a person at a deep level instead of like like looking what’s behind their words instead of just listening to trying to listen to their words and then trying to think of why you’re gonna say next like really just engage in the conversation 100 percent listen to like try to listen sure the tone of voice no their facial expressions their gestures all these different types of body languages that they can they can do they can make in the present moment if you can focus on that and just go up to up up up to talking to anybody just saying hey this person this is another human being just like me this isn’t like a super attractive female or super attractive male or someone I’m really intimidated by because you have so much more money than I they were or is way more successful or whatever doesn’t matter it’s just another human being just like you yeah so go up and talk to the person not a big deal this person could be the person the love of your life you know you never know yeah you got to make that first move man and I think whenever we’re talking about being authentic and being vulnerable and we look at the celebrities or we look at people who just have a seat of authority or a place of position it makes it that much more harder for them to say that they’re struggling or to say that they need help and I just remember of like even being like a leader in the church years ago and and I was looked at to be this super spiritual guy or whatever you don’t want to admit that you are going through stuff or you need help because everything’s riding on it you’re gonna kill their vision of you of being the super spiritual guy or the guy who has everything together but little do you know I’m dealing with depression I have thoughts of suicide like I need help I need to confess this and talk to people talk to someone about this but so that’s just like in a small church level right and different seats of authority and power and leadership you look at chester bennington or these people who have a lot it’s gonna make headlines chester bennington battling depression they don’t want that stuff out there for the general public so for them to have to admit that they have a lot riding on that maybe album sales will drop maybe this maybe that maybe they won’t get booked they’ll lose the gig if Tom Cruise comes out and says what he’s really dealing with or whatever the case says you know and so people who have a lot of people looking to them we see it a lot with pastors man and if you don’t deal with it it’s gonna get you like you need to talk to somebody you really do because we see these pastors man over megator ch’s who are like out there doing crystal meth with teenage boys and having extramarital relationships with young boys and stuff and like that has to start somewhere like it just doesn’t like it you know it was a snake at first and now it’s a dragon so you got to deal with it cuz sin the Bible says that like whenever sin whenever it whenever it’s full-grown it gives birth to death man but if you can nip it when it’s when it’s small man don’t entertain it and deal with that stuff that’s not healthy or it’s good all right you don’t deal with it it’s gonna deal with you yep you’re too much whatever yeah because you know once you once you I think the trick is really is once you start feeling it once you start recognizing and ruins your consciously aware like okay this is what’s really going on yeah talk about it write about it you don’t talk to anyone about it that’s okay you can grab grab a piece of paper just write down like what’s really going on in your head you know and then just just just get it out do thoughts out whatever you have to do we’ve got to just change that because a lot of things are real come o manifest once you realize that you once you start opening up a lot of things change a lot of things happen now you realize they’ll be able to connect more deeply with other people like for instance my relationships all my relationships I’ve gone from more superficial like like we’re trying this person that I’ve met that but I wanted into you guys like this really positive guy is always really successful makes a lot of money you know writes books that’s all they thought of me but now I’m really not I’m just a human being I go through struggles like everybody else does know just the other side of you is still a part of you though but it’s not like it’s not you all of its part of you you know what I’m saying and that’s the thing right that that’s the whole picture you have to be open with that instead of like selling them a persona or selling them this this false vision is false narrative and be okay with it it took a long time for me man I remember when I was just you know it was a big thing where I started like playing Pokemon go with my family and doing gaming videos and tutorial videos with my daughter and there’s all kind of fun stuff that I loved and then here’s this vision that people had of me of being some guru or whatever which I am I’m a guru but I’m also a guru who loves to play pokemon go with my family and do silly videos and play video games so to like not show the audience that side of you you know I had to like split it it was different personalities man but all of that is a part of me so it’s like all or nothing you know I’m saying to not be scared to be authentic and be who you really are or to say what you you like or you enjoy that’s a big thing especially you know I deal with a lot of people coming out of religion I came out of it myself and you have to be this and if you step out of line you’re done so you’re like oh god I can’t I can’t be depressed you know we used to go to church and people would greet you at the door and they said how you doing today brother it would say uh I’m blessed and highly favored you know what I’m saying that everybody would repeat that no it’s like it it still goes on now go to church and you hear it and um but really on the inside you feel like you can’t say I’m struggling with my beliefs I’m contemplating suicide I’m depressed I can you can’t walk in you really want to know how I’m doing or is that just some kind of cordial are you doing and you expect me to say bless or highly favored really I can’t be open with you guys and tell you guys that I’m flirting with blowing my head off you know what I’m saying eeep star I write and then the crazy it’s really it’s really wild because you know a lot of times I when I when I did become more open and vulnerable and authentic I realized that a lot of people I showed so much appreciation and they began to do it too they began to be more open about like what’s really going on in their in their lives and by doing this I feel like like we can actually save lives by by being more authentic and talking with people who will actually listen but people who love you even people that you don’t even know I mean it’s more risky of course if you talk to somebody that you you haven’t had a past connection with but I mean the reality is so many people want to help out like we are our size as human beings we want to help out at one another we love each other you know and it’s important for us to be authentic and connect with one another because you know by doing this we’ll feel a sense of belonging a sense of connection and people will feel like when you share they can share about themselves too so that’s another great feeling yeah man you you you pull it out of people you pull the best out of them I don’t think it’s an option I do think it’s mandatory man I think that eventually you have to get over the facade of painting this picture or selling this PETA people to a false image of yourself or creating this character that’s not really you I do think that that true personal freedom spiritual freedom is being authentic and being vulnerable I think it comes with it with the territory and I would see people doing this and they would pull it out of me and I talked about this man I would get jealous I would get envious that this person could have all of these different likes and we mentioned Joe Rogan before we went live checking out his podcast and Joe Rogan kind of did that to me a little bit cuz he could talk about this then he can talk about that then he can be okay with this and then he and all of these subjects that make up the entity Joe Rogan all of it the depression whatever but but being okay with all of it yeah like UFC yeah I like meditation I like the fight and I like to meditate and be spiritual and do mushrooms or whatever and be okay with that and then and there’s other people in my life one of them was John Illuminati Kongo good friend of mine he’s a he’s a guru he’s in the meditation but he’ll also cuss you out like you know what I’m saying that’s just who he is and to see these people be their authentic self it would move me to envy but in a good way to like man I want to find out who I am and just be that you know what I’m saying instead of compartmentalize okay to this person I have to be this into that person I have to be that there’s time and place for that in business and relationship and becoming all things to all men but you it’s still all coming from the self it’s all coming from you it’s all a part of you yes yes yeah it’s like striving it’s striving to be something you know like like Joe Rogan or Allah I mean I look up them too it’s amazing how how often two kids you know are you just like doesn’t care you know it doesn’t get rid of the people he’s like himself that’s great like like that’s the gospel a cup that holds a big goal of where I would love to be you know I’m I’m working towards the addends I know you’re working towards that like a lot of people in this world I’m working towards that I think it’s amazing and people admire that so much yeah and that’s like and in our society because it’s crazy because if you look at other cultures such as Russia India Japan even some other South Eastern European countries a lot of the cultures are more interdependent whereas the US and Western societies like the like the UK and and from Australia are more independent like they’re very like they have to do it alone you know they have to become creative level of success by themself know and without a without a community all their emotions are are stemmed from their own thoughts you know as opposed to it sort of in a places were where they believe that that one person’s emotion is also based on what other person’s actions like like know where they’re not it’s not a hundred percent your fault if you’re feeling a certain way which is interesting which i think is true yeah but a lot of our society I mean you asses be like no no you can get you can do it on your own you need to do it by yourself figure this out on figure this shit out on your own and get over it yeah yeah there’s some good there’s some some things that you have to kind of reason within yourself and go on that inward journey of what you want for yourself and for your life and nobody’s gonna make that happen but we need support systems we need our tribe no man is an island you know I’m saying and if you don’t have that one would be provided for you you know we plug in what we’re doing discord you need to connect with like-minded people and if somebody’s listening to this they’re listening for a reason to connect and just to have people to roll ideas off of to let I’m not crazy am I have you ever have you guys ever felt this I got I’m getting messages right now on Facebook oh yeah need to talk to you about aliens and in the third eye up in there guys I’ll go into the woods and I feel like something’s trying to contact me what do I do like who do you go to do you go to your pastor do you go to your parents what do you go to for that so like us being open with these weird conversations or whatever you become a beacon for you you attract those type of people just to let them know look you’re not crazy other people have had some things happen to them and you’re gonna be okay so you have people to roll ideas off of when I was you know having my awakening having kooky experiences and stuff like I needed somebody to talk to and I didn’t have anybody I went on podcast I listened to interviews where people were talking about spirituality and spiritual experiences and stuff the same thing with achieving your dreams how do you do that how do I create this life that I want for myself how do I be authentic okay we’re gonna give you tips we’re just simply gonna let you know what works for us and we’ve been working with other people such as yourself working with clients helping them to be authentic giving them tips how to be mindful you know what I’m saying all of these there’s practices you can do to pull your conscious awareness back to the present moment breathing techniques and things like that and it’s so powerful that’s the only moment that we have we don’t have we’re not promised tomorrow all we have is right now mm-hmm now I can’t take that back that word yes I can’t even that’s in it so I just said I can’t take it back but we’re creating in the moment and then now and being present and understanding what that is Amen brother you that’s all right you know and it’s all about the present moment and it’s just enjoy what you have because we’re now promised tomorrow we don’t know if when I love a meteor will drop on the u.s. next no tomorrow we don’t know but the reality you bought some really good points you know because we all think things that are that are weird or wrong or that we don’t want to talk about you know we all think that but the reality is every there’s there’s at least there’s all the times when people don’t think weird thoughts all around the world you know every thought that you’ve had somebody else has had that thought 100 other times you not I mean like you’re not as weird as you think you are like everybody has crazy thoughts and the thing is like another thing I want to talk about it with emotions is that like people that are bilingual and trilingual or just people that speak to other languages and have more they’re allergic they’re shown to have more emotional intelligence because they feel like different people when they’re speaking different languages so they can so it’s it’s crazy because what happens is you can you can feel leave the thoughts that you’re having may not be able to there may not be a word for how you’re feeling in the English language but that way you’re feeling it’s like a common word and then in Portuguese or in you know a little Italian yep so well if you can speak other languages it’s like it’s a whole new whole new door that recognising your emotions and understanding okay this is actually normal I hear this well this is how I feel so okay I’m gonna deal with it oh I’m normal yeah man it’s like that too with like breaking down like the Greek and Hebrew understanding the Bible and trying to break that down like the different levels of love will say I like you or I love you and that’s pretty much all we got but when you break that word love down in the end in the Greek there’s like seven or eight different levels of love agape Alejo and it’s it’s these different levels like okay I love you as a friend I love you as a brother I love you like you’re my child I love you like oh I love you as an intimate lover like my spouse like there’s all these different levels but you only get the word love but in the other languages they have all of these different breakdowns for that type of emotion man and it gets really deep it’s beautiful when you know especially especially when you’re looking into that I’m sending different levels of it so yeah I like that I like that I like your net that’s so true so true I’ve ever heard of a guy named Gabe r’mante he was on a Tim Ferriss podcast I’m not sure right off yeah yeah so he’s a really really impressive individual he has basically worked with people that have dealt with addictions for many years addictions and depression because a lot of times people who are depressed get dependent on addictions they’re really closely tied together but you know one thing he says that like if we can if we can change our society in a way that where our parents and teachers were given like the education and support needed to help them help their children become meet their needs or children’s basic needs for like expressing their emotions or understanding the the basic needs for connection and attachment way less way more or less way way less adults would be an exterior experiencing post-traumatic stress disorder now because a lot of people are dealing with post traumatic stress disorder Beco well that starts from the childhood because they’re not able to actually understand emotions understand connection understand how important an attachment to their parents and children you know and a lot of times like I was saying like a lot of without being able to handle our traumas that often happen as a child we turned through addictions or become ill or become sick or become depressed a lot of things like that those childhood relationships man are powerful and like bring it into like a spiritual sense a lot of people look at God their view of this father figure God with the way that they had their relationship with their parents if so if they time they messed up every time they dropped something in the house or broke something or whatever their parent was ready to beat them or slap them or come down upon them they have this idea of God that God is ready to punish you every time you mess up every time you do something wrong that God is I told you not to do that why did you do it you know what I’m saying and so they project that with their relationship with the Creator man and so many people have done that and it come from broken homes and broken relationships and stuff and so for me I think the pot was there is like the opposite like this God figure being what your parents weren’t you know what I’m saying like giving you what they couldn’t give you a what they didn’t give you you don’t understand so you can connect with the source your God and get what you need it that you weren’t nurtured or when you were a child you know what I’m saying and kind of right the wrongs there you know right right yeah that’s a good point you know I feel like I mean I think you should want all of our parents do the best that they know how to do I believe that but also like you’re saying like I feel like you’re talking about shame like and a lot of times shame does start in childhood but a lot of times also shame is never I healed it that’s one of the things that causes people to be unwilling to be vulnerable and open our outfits because they’ve been shamed in the past before where they feel guilty if they talk about certain things you know and it’s a huge blockage to being open and vulnerable in and sharing your thoughts and being emotionally open now and the first thing is really to Starly get started looking at what you think of yourself in regards to your worthiness are you worthy do you feel like you’re worthy of love do you feel like you’re worthy of support and and good things in your life so you feel worthy and then and then if you first some reason you don’t feel worthy like how many people in the US don’t feel we’re the many people in the world don’t feel worthy of love all right no yeah which is really sad I mean it’s true because I wasn’t that boat before I feel like it wasn’t where they’ve loved it but like I never finally I’m in my life you know and but thank God I did it projects too odd – how can God love me do you know what I’ve done do you know what I’ve done in those secrets and those weird thoughts that I’ve had and those things that I’ve done that nobody knows about there’s no way God can love me so there’s at that level there of not you know not feeling worthy and yeah you know what I’m saying and some people never get over that you can you know it’s hard to communicate that grace to them or the love that’s there is tangible for them that they they like never make it to that level because they can never get over the shame and the things that they’ve done which shame could be used as a good thing like that emotions there for a reason that you feel bad or feel guilty when you did something wrong not when you didn’t do something wrong so you don’t want that feeling to come back again you don’t ever want to feel that way again if you lie if you steal you know you’re you actually bless you show red in the face when you’re ashamed and you blush and it and you can’t hide it before God you stole and you can’t hide it because your face is red you know what I’m saying so you’re gonna tell that’s that that’s that shame there that’s you have for good reasons that we don’t you know want to feel that way so we should never get used to the shame when we getting be okay with feeling that way you know right right yeah the other emotions there for a reason really and and the thing is like also a winner when you’re trying what are you jumping into embracing vulnerability it’s like recognizing when you’re resisting it because a lot of times we try to like dodge or emotions we try to not really feel what we’re feeling you know and a lot of times we’ll either change the subject or no well like when someone asks us a personal question about how we’re feeling you know sometimes we get irritated or angry you know and and then we got to ask ourselves like okay what was that about why are you irritated why are we angry ya know sometimes we’ll get really distracted when they ask your emotional questions like some things but these are the things that really matter like questions based on emotions and I know a lot of man that like never want to talk about emotions I mean oh they’ll deflect it they’ll they’ll be like oh I’m all good don’t bother me how are you feeling you know that’s right wanting to cry and stuff like that I I remember talking about church with with people especially guys who were in the prison system because I used to work with inmates and we used to greet each other with the hug you know you know in the scriptures they greeted each other with the kids you know what I’m saying Oh whenever whenever we seen one another we would hug we give each other adapt and then bring it in for the hug and a leg and I would talk to people who have never had that connection I’m like but I want another man hugging me for and they couldn’t like that connection there was like a bad Barney Rubble connection that you’re embraced by another man even just with an a hug you know what I’m saying it and they can’t fathom that that could that connection man yep yep it’s it’s amazing it’s amazing now what what a powerful effect it can actually have on people because because one of the most important things about connection is is actually the human touch when you’re touching another human being all kinds of different hormones emotions are released in your body and it’s it’s an incredible thing holding babies you know what I’m saying babies yeah I mean premature babies they have people on staff that go down and just hold them and they’re connecting with them energetically and and giving love to them there’s a really good documentary a lot of people give it flak because the first one was so crazy but it’s the zeitgeist documentary right the second one there’s the zeitgeist moving forward and it goes into a lot of detail about the human touch and holding babies and people who don’t get that from children who don’t get that from their parents and their parent that dad’s never touched them doesn’t hug them and you didn’t you’re not getting what you’re supposed to be getting from that love and it’s passed on like there’s some kind of connection there but that guys moving forward is the second one make sure y’all watch that I’ll check that out too you know yeah but that’s so important you know I mean getting love if you have the opportunity yet to be loved by both your parents that’s such an important thing can make your life a world of the difference I mean look at a lot the women were like in the prostitution very I mean not even prostitution you can you can go there but you can even just say women who were very promiscuous a lot of times they’re looking for that comfort from the male figure that they didn’t get from their father you know it’s not every case but I would say the majority they didn’t have a good relationship with their father yeah it’s important you know and ago that it all ties in together it’s all like related you know but the reason that woman is like that is generally speaking because of the relationship with the father know that was lacking that I was missing I was ready I would see different like coming up like my uh my brothers and my grandfather and my cousins their relationships with women was unhealthy like theirs physically abusive verbally abusive and it was normal in a house full of people to slap your girlfriend slap your wife beater around us or out do all this weird stuff and I was like this can’t be right in like if you don’t stop that cycle or learn that that’s wrong you can easily your grandfather your dad you know I’m saying and you’re next but you have to like stop there generational curse as it’s called or kind of learn from the mistakes of others moving forward man really yeah yeah because the change is up to you I mean you’re the only one that can really change your generational lineage know if your dad in it and they or grandpa did it now you’re the one that has the choice to actually follow through no because you know it’s you know it’s not right yeah I mean it’s really not right it’s like guys more hurt but yeah it’s like dealing with it when it’s little you have to do because if you don’t it becomes a habit and it’s okay to do this it’s okay to to cheat it’s okay to flirt with other one and even though you’re married like it becomes okay then becomes a problem then you’ll go outside of your marriage or whatever the case is and so you have to catch this stuff when it’s young man to be successful in anything because we talked about like building an empire building a podcast building a ministry whatever you’re trying to build like you had there’s ah there’s a lot of stuff that you have to take with you over into that you can’t just like show up and I was talking with a friend of my Adam Starseed yesterday in the discord and like what if you had a ministry but then you blow up on people all the time or you curse someone out and you’re like a minister or whatever like that’s not gonna look good you’re gonna build this huge platform and then you’re gonna blow it because someone called you a name or somebody stole from you or somebody did something that triggered you that that pulled you out of your character so in building whatever we’re trying to build moving forward and in a career or whatever there’s things that you have to take with you there’s lessons you have to learn and you have to go through these testings and trials and things and I personally believe that they’re ordered by God man that God is like carefully setting up these situations to plane-crash something that was you know saying devastating from your family you learned something you took something from it to go back come out with a place of gratitude – hey I’m thankful I could it I could have died I could have you know and and I’m thankful for every breath this side of the crash you know what I’m saying and so you approach life with this level of gratitude man and to learn from everything in our lives and not just the good stuff we all can glory and thank God in the good stuff but can you do it in the bad and you do it you know when when things don’t go your way and I’ve been talking with people people posting status updates and stuff on Facebook and my a friend of mine said he he thanks God for everything good in his life I think gough all the bad stuff – and I know I wouldn’t thank God for bad stuff I was like no I need the bad stuff sometimes more than the good stuff and the power is that you still have that gratitude when things aren’t that’s when you need it man you need it when everything’s you know I’m saying turned upside down and you don’t know what’s coming tomorrow if not you’re gonna be a victim man you’re gonna be I hate to throw it out there you gonna be a chester bennington you’re gonna be Anthony Bourdain when the struggles and trials and life that piles up up on you man you know what I’m saying you have to learn each and every one of us has to be able to learn from there Bali when I’m going through it I need to talk to somebody man I can’t keep this stuff in I’m a freak out if I keep this stuff in you know what I’m saying totally yeah that’s such a good pile of that I love that you know I kind of remember hearing that before by being grateful for the bass of the Tappan Zee because that’s such that’s where the lessons are you know really but over the everything you always had good stuff happen to you you never learned anything yeah all the bad stuff is where you learn stuff you grow as a person you get stronger no and you become you’re able to actually create who you want to be in those moments because those are the trials and those are the things that God gives you God God never gives you anything that you can handle yeah God God knows what you can handle and that’s so true man I’d be grateful for everything that happens for you to you you know be grateful to be alive you’re grateful for all for the plane crash for what you learn from that what I learned from the plane crash you’re grateful for know everything I mean it’s so much to be grateful for in this life that’s that’s what I’m at that’s where the magic is room it really is that’s that’s the power of creativity to be able to to be to approach it like that and remember to be grateful though it’s like you’re right you know because when you’re grateful you can only be in the present moment like you when you’re great when you’re feeling the sense of gratitude inside your body like I’m grateful to be here talking to you you know just just feel about just like what amazing feeling I’m grateful to have my computer actually be able to talk to you where we go next yeah man created [Music] incredible a part of like going going through the trials and going through the darkness and be you know being okay with it and being grateful and thankful for it it’s like you’re not going to appreciate the light like if you’re born and the lights always on you’re not gonna be a appreciative of it unless you ever had to do time or go to a place where there was no light there was only darkness and then someone turns out the light just thank if we’re doing this this interview and the lights cut out we can’t see anything even in the room or or whatever the power cuts out when a we kind of we cut there’s people who are born with it and they just expect it to show up they just expect their like to be there but if you’re in a place of darkness and someone turns on the light you’re appreciative of that light and say how marvelous that light is and and the greater the darkness the more magnificent the light is you know what I’m saying those who are forgiving much love much you know what I’m saying I don’t I really don’t think like I think that those people who have been for like I said forgiving of a lot who have been down through there I got friends who have amazing crazy stories yours as well man coming from places of darkness and places where you probably should have given up you probably should have threw in the towel but you didn’t you know what I’m saying this so now you’re at that level of gratitude that you approach life with and and and and and are able to to be that light to others and just to you you’re like a moon you reflect the light man you bring that light into dark places and people who are asking questions and people who need help with life this thing is tricky man this thing is tricky just turn to television on everybody’s got the truth everybody has the answers and they’re all telling you different things somebody’s lying you know what I’m saying like it’s tricky to kind of navigate through this thing it is I mean life is life is definitely hard you’re gonna get so many challenges and like you said you man so many people take things for granted I mean I’m so grateful they’ve even now even we have electricity that we have light like you’re saying you know I mean it’s incredible and we’re all on this thing called life together like we’re all in this you got to be there for one another we can’t just you know say it screw you screw you you know it’s all like we’re all together we got to become more connected more interconnected like others other communities are like this it’ll make such a world of a difference that are happening a level of happiness and even even if you talk even like speaking highly of people that you dislike even though it would be spire it starts speaking highly of people who don’t even know ya or normally speaking lowly EV you know once you start changing your dialogue your thoughts and the way you feel about yourself it’s only change to powerful always always important to be positive about people no man I remember when I was into like the conspiracy theories I got really deep in a conspiracy to 9/11 Alex Jones and just I mean researching it all it was all I’m saying the moon landing the government’s lying this and that and it there’s not an end and there’s not a shortage of conspiracy theories in it it will mess with you you’ll mess with you the RFID chip people are gonna be kidnapped from their homes and placed in FEMA camps and FEMA coffins and the presidents are selected and then they’re not elected they’re fake and just all of the crazy conspiracy stuff that there’s some truth to a lot of it but when you start thinking about all of this negativity and everybody’s out to get you it creates this weird mindset for you and I remember and I don’t not not that this is right or maybe it’s showing me being vulnerable but I remember consciously making myself pray or whether maybe George Bush well we had watching all of this bad stuff on not not that like to pray for him not not that I literally thought my prayer would like change his heart or whatever the case is or whatever it did but for what it did for me to someone I was talking down on and researching all of this family history and this guy is plotting this and they’re behind all of this stuff or Obama or whatever the cases like to go to my prayer clot closet and pray a prayer for their family that God would use them but you know I’m saying then for the first time cuz I that wasn’t a practice that I did I’m researching all this negative stuff about these guys and how these guys are demonic and crazy conspiracy stuff but once I seen them in a different light consciously seen them I came out of that weird conspiracy darkness that I was in and I was able to kind of move further in my spiritual walk have beautiful thoughts on my mind versus looking for the bad signs in everything that you do there’s a loominatee symbolism there’s a demon here there’s a demon there all of this kind of stuff to really be able to install enjoying life not being freaked out all the time a lot of people out there are freaked out man it’s this into all of this crazy stuff because there’s no end of it you’re never gonna get to the bottom of it and say aha and if you do then what are you gonna do with it I’m just gonna inform people I’m gonna wait people up it’s really is there’s really no means to the end and it’s really about enjoying your life bringing light into the darkness and being there for people and helping people you know find God or whatever the cases and people like I have friends who are like evangelist they go out and a minister they beckon people to come to God and stuff and they want me to do that you know I used to do that I used to be on the street corners preaching and all this kind of stuff and they say you know I’m missing God because I’m not doing that and I just say look the only thing I can do is simply show the same grace that has been shown to me to others those who have never experienced that that that has the power to change their life the good news is that there is grace and that there is love and that there is hope and there you’re not at the end of the rope there’s more you know what I’m saying and there is forgiveness and there is sovereignty and and all of these things and being an expression of that versus just running out to a street corner shouting it out I’m gonna embody it I’m gonna be it in the world in my day to day life and just be an expression of that light and love man and I think that’s what it’s about for me man um may I ask you this we’re coming up towards the end of the show you got a new book out and it has a really interesting title provocative title but it’s it I think it embodies a lot of the stuff that we’ve been talking about talk a little bit about the new book and your inspiration behind that man it’s really really interesting going share the name as well oh yeah yeah so this is my new book it’s called unzip your pants how to be vulnerable in an apt up world so I know it’s a crazy title but initially what I wanted it was I wanted it to be for men aged like 25 to may age 15 because they I want that I want to stir some curiosity I wanted to be like oh my god this is like not a book that’s titled on your heart or all the ins oppression oh I’m gonna grab that and I’m gonna read that vulnerability again no but I wanted men to read this book I got cuz I because I feel like I mean the truth is a seven or eight out of seven or eight suicide seven or eight out of ten suicides are men so clearly men need a lot of help and vulnerability is where it all starts vulnerability and connection that’s what that’s what Maine especially you need more of women naturally are better at this woman Ashley are able to connect him and be more emotional and be more sharing and loving with each other no more nurturing that’s just it the way they’re wired you know where women are wired which is amazing but Maine aren’t really wired that way men have to work at it and have to really figure out how to listen how to understand you know really what’s what they’re feeling how to understand how to recognize emotions know especially if they don’t speak multiple languages it says that discussed before so I went on this venture and just III did a ton of research based on because like I said it all started when I was afraid to be vulnerable and open up because I was always afraid of being embarrassed I don’t want to you know look look stranger than my persona had always portrayed is this positive like successful guy knows who’s done so much with his life you know that’s the part of that is true but there’s a whole other side like I’m at the vulnerable side which is the authentic but true the genuine part of who you really are who I really am now what I’m actually facing what really matters is my emotions and the things that I’ve been through in my life but I can use as lessons that I can help other people learn from and so I’m losing this vulnerable nur ability as a lesson that I learned but I can outshoot you and other other your listeners know that there is so much power in being vulnerable so much freedom and ability to get in the present moment which is really where it all matters when you’re when you begin to be vulnerable and share what’s really going on with with the people you love know instead of I mean you don’t have to announce that this the whole world on social media you don’t want so I mean you can but you don’t have to yeah yeah that was that was inspiration me on my book so yeah yeah I came out about a couple of days ago and I’m really proud of it I’ve got a lot of really good feedback it’s for sale on Amazon so definitely check it out but this this conversation got you’re interested in anything I’m also gonna talk a little bit about my other book sure thing cool my other book I read about three years ago it’s called how to live in the present moment let go of the past and stop worrying about the future this was a book this was this is I know we talked a little bit about the present moment in its conversation but like I was saying the present moment is really where everything is I where the freedom is I where the peace of mind is that where you actually do feel peaceful in it a really grateful peaceful loving place where you can working baby now interestingly enough our minds it seems like we’re designed so think about the future in the past and not so much about staying in the present which is like a challenge but in the book I basically talk I walk through different techniques is how you can get in the present moment through meditation yoga different conversations such as connecting deeply with the person’s words what’s behind the words things like that so yeah I mean I mean there’s got to be something to it we look at somebody like Eckhart Tolle who you know his works dedicated to being in the now in the moment and this guy’s a millionaire something’s working about being present and being in the moment and I like to you know we like to talk about meditation or psychedelic encounters or just having a dream I felt like those things seem like they’re in the future I feel like we go through the meditation practice or the psychedelic journey and we grab them and we bring them into the now moment and not so much that they’re really you’re going into the future because it’s already in you it’s already a part of you it’s already in you now as if it’s in the future then we have to wait for something to manifest we to wait for something but if it’s within us we can birth it we can create it because it’s already locked within us man and that was a like a deep revelation that I came to it’s not you’re not waiting for something to happen you’re not waiting for something outside of you but everything’s within the universe is within the kingdom of heaven is within you you need nothing outside yourself you don’t need to go here or do this things help there’s events there’s gurus there’s people that are designed to help us but they’re if they’re a real leader or they’re gonna teach you how to do these techniques yourself you go within to manifest it and that’s where I seen the most power and the most fruit and to be able to start seeing those visions that person that I want to be the relationships I want to have the goals that I want to achieve a vision without action is merely a dream Kevin gates right now today I mean look at look at how much hope people need like there’s so many people that need help I mean think of how many things have been designed now just to help people like psychedelics like this is this huge medical research on the power of ayahuasca for instance like if it’s held in the right ceremony but the right shaman now this can potentially decrease depression to help out with addiction like a lot of studies have been shown above for doing that and like even even the different psychedelic things like that like help with anxiety and depression things like that that’s what is the healing wait yeah that’s good that’s good you brought that up yeah and it’s totally interesting because like like these things were shunned 20 years ago I mean like oh my god no don’t talk about that ever you know but now it’s like now it’s enjoying more where are cultural people are being like okay let’s talk about this it’s not the conversation about this this is actually working when I mean things like that another topic another topic would be like Benxi Gong like Eastern medicine like Tai Chi all these mindfulness practices the healthy flower there with their stress with their you know with their day to day grind that people are struggling with so hard to stay on top of that’s you got to get that out the way first man and that’s so that’s so beautiful you know and you had that link there is that the ayahuasca the psilocybin you were saying even the meditation helps you to deal with the stress once that’s out of the way then we can be present when you’re in it sort of a really awesome idea to understand that we have to deal with that stuff first moving forward that’s a bad thing yeah yes do that like in my in my book how to live in the present moment to point out I I talk about like I mean this this is the kind of the algorithm I like to use 80% of your life live in the present moment enjoy what’s going on twenty ten percent he’s ten percent in the past to learn from and the other ten percent in the future it’s kind of say your dream say your goals no that’s where that’s the algorithm I like to use it’s it’s not always that easy to do but that’s the algorithm that’s good to keep at the back you mind yeah man um there’s a scripture you know it says that uh Jesus says be anxious for nothing and when you’re anxious when you’re waiting and anticipating something to happen you’re outside of yourself and I learned that years ago with like when I was in a band I would have we’d have concerts and stuff and it was new and exciting but I would spend all of my subconscious time thinking of this event how this concerts gonna be grand and can’t wait for it to happen and and it’s easy to book stuff months in advance weeks in advance in your mind it’s always thinking about the events and how’s it gonna be you know I’m gonna make memories I’m gonna do all this but you’re not present because your mind is at this later event that you’re anticipating and then it kind of came to me because we would do the event and it wasn’t as good as I had dreamed it in my mind like it was more fun thinking about it cuz uh it came and went man I was looking forward to this for months and now it’s hearing gone and it wasn’t as as good so I was like I can’t I was aware that I spent all of that time thinking about this thing that just came and went and then therefore you had the next thing on their calendar oh man this is gonna be fun we’re going to see this or we got a vacay we’re going to Disney oh man christmas is coming up Oh God and you’re just outside of yourself versus bringing that awareness into the now moment where all the the relationships are where the power is where creativity is where your tribe is your people are man they’re in the now moment they don’t depth that the future doesn’t exist it will never exist the past is you can’t change it you can’t take you back it’s only the present moment and learning the tricks of the trade and the techniques and I look at it like universal law I think there’s rules to this game we’re playing called life many of us don’t are playing the game by default were in the game and we don’t understand the rules just like if you were just to show up at a random board game and start playing and you’re just like moving stuff around and knocking stuff over you have no idea but I say look this is what you got to do this person does this this does this this does this and then we can win you know we can we can make stuff happen together you know as you understand the rules I think they’re the you know we look into Eastern Eastern thought like you’re talking about we look into these mindfulness practices I think we can look into you know all the laws of other cultures and see what what was working for them the laws of ma’at we look into the law of Moses you’re looking to the seven hermetic principles all of these things about vibration and time and being mindful man and it’s all there something is there something’s going on but what but when we learned that man and we become consciously aware and bring it into the now moment and try to start doing some of these things I guarantee you things will happen you’ll start to see change right right I agree on a percent man right and and also other thing I just want to mention it’s like like when you’re in the future you have all these expectations kind of like when you’re new when you were talking about your band and these expectations of what it was gonna be like you know but the poem is that expectations often crush the present moment because the present moment is never exactly the exact same as this is expected to be ya know so you gotta enjoy I had to learn how to enjoy the present moment and let go of your expectations yeah that’s you know and that it’s kind of coupled with the celebrity thing and and there’s a statement a lot of people are saying don’t meet your uh your idols the people you look up to like it’ll ruin it for you if you meet them because you have this otherworldly expectation and it’s probably false most likely false because you believe that that person is who they are on their songs you don’t think that that person goes to the bathroom or you know is just a regular person like you that puts their pants on one leg at a time and they tell you don’t meet your idols man because you’ll be let down and when I started doing like the spiritual hip hop type of stuff man I was head over heels for a lot of these guys I was flattered by their art in the spirituality and what they brought to the table but little did I know that these dudes did most the majority of these guys weren’t spiritual people it’s like a fairy tale it’s like fantasy hip hop they’re like rapping other people’s stories and other people’s lives and Here I am listening to this music about meditation and Tibetan monks and chanting and astral travelling and taking ayahuasca and I’m like man these dudes are deep man these dudes got this knowledge and I meet them in there like now we don’t meditate now we just every other one’s a curse word and I’m like oh my god I’m so let down by this guy I wish I would have never met them and then their buttholes you know they’re rude they’re not they don’t live my spiritual practices but in their music they’re these really awesome dudes and so I’ve tried to be authentic with that in my life because like the stuff I rap about I try to practice but even that though like people meet you and they’re let down enough you know I had someone come to I had a bunch of people man this this because of the podcast and my music is getting a lot bigger I had my last album release party I had people draw from all over the country to come down to be with us we was that somebody salad we did a house party album release party and people drove 12 hours 10 hours 14 hours it was insane one dude drove and didn’t even get to meet me he drove on the wrong day long day I’m gonna make we’re gonna meet brother if you’re listening but um yeah and so but they have an expectation like they’re coming to meet a holy man or they’re coming to meet I’m a regular guy I’m walking around I’m having a beer celebrating with my friends and family and they have this expectation of you or that when I meet it’s gonna be grand as this person’s gonna do this or or they’re something else you know and so they say don’t meet the people you look up to man don’t meet your idols but then other people to say you know what I meet my idols or I worry about that I worried about you know meeting a bunch of you know I’m available man you know what I’m saying and I’ve met a lot of people here in the chat we hang out I’m open and um but it’s not it’s kind of good to be let down though right to be pulled off of that pedestal I said look I’m I’m human like what I’m doing you can do we’re in this together I’m not greater than anybody I started all podcasts I love my podcast it’s awesome I get to talk to awesome people but guess what you can too you can do it too would you you want to write a rap album you want to do whatever I’m talking about in the city you can do too you know what I’m saying so it’s a it’s a it’s a weird dichotomy there what would you say man have you ever met a celebrity or met someone and you were let down after you like me it was thought this guy yeah yeah yeah I’ve been a few celebrities and I was let down because I Wayne are going go over that these expectations I was like oh my god this guy’s like I God this guy’s like the best of the best you know but these expectations were what ruin it all you know because I got you will go in there with X what thinking that like okay this person’s human just like me he’s no better no worse than me I was just a human being I’ll be going there with that perspective then it’s like okay cool I’m just good he is what he is and that’s it he is what he is he’s not like this or that daughter someone’s super you know powerful it’s still scary man it’s so scary because you want this person to be you know the it’s so funny it’s even like the Bible and stuff like where people read it they interpret like what they want it to say you know that doesn’t really say that right it says sentencing actually it’s actually a slap in the face if you read that verse I no no no that is good like there’s some bad stuff in there – none of the bad stuff don’t exist it didn’t happen you know what I’m saying or whatever it’s a weird expectations of what it is gonna be like versus being in the moment and even the celebrity thing they tell you don’t get caught up even on the inside if you’re like oh my god this is the person I’ve been listening to since I was a kid like I’ve been in those encounters like I you know I talked to bizzy bone from bone thugs-n-harmony my favorite rapper I had him on the podcast I I’m a fanboy I was let down I guess maybe know that the interview didn’t go the way I thought it was gonna go but I knew what type of individual he was though so um yeah it’s weird you know it’s it’s weird and we had to we had to prepare ourselves to be let down and it’s okay I have to learn you know you’re analyzing these people and you’re totally you never know you know I mean if you’re without expectations the person might be more than you’re expected but births might be even more awesome and you thought they would be yeah you never know and there might be just the person you dream though you know it’s no but but and the key is to go in there without expectations of you or if you can lower your expectations I know it’s really big sensation well if you go in there with like very little like the idea of like whatever happens happens have that perspective I’m like whatever happens happens you know he’s a human being or she’s a human being okay cool we’ll see what happens now I’m just taught what does it expect the worst hope for the best you know you don’t want to expect the worse I don’t like I feel like that’s bringing like negative energy into the picture so I’m like expecting the worst I’d rather just say like have no expectations don’t expect you’ll be late hope for the best it was the same thing with me when I was in the bands and stuff too because we should throw concerts and and and you know you you have a date and you’re booking it and you promote it and you’re like that’s gonna be awesome and then nobody shows up you’re like damn seven people here you know I’m saying and then we did another concert we got 300 people you know and so it was just different and so I learned it’s well there it’s like you put it out there the people who were supposed to show up the people who were supposed to be here are gonna be here and so to trust that they do everything you do to promote learn ways and techniques on how to do that master your craft whatever it is you’re doing learn ways to do it but at the end of the day whoever is supposed to be here that they’re gonna be here and this even this podcast whoever supposed to listen whoever supposed to tune in they’re gonna get it you know when they’re supposed to get it you know what I’m saying and and they’re gonna apply these these techniques and they’re and and they’re gonna learn and bring it into their their situation and that’s how it works and uh you can never be let down by that yes I look seven people showed up okay well guess what seven people had an awesome time seven people I got to meet and pour into seven people with force if 300 people would not would have showed up there’s no way I could have divided myself and been there for those people or with those and people so you know what I’m saying and just expecting not expect the worst but don’t have any expectant expectations man and just show up and uh and be present now that’s a I love that perspective though you know just like I love the sudden people those are the seven people that were meant to be there and that was it you know they had the most amazing experience of their life perhaps you know that’s such an important way of looking at it yeah um that I mean just think though like if we look at the concert because it wasn’t a huge concert there was maybe 50 people there or so and people drove from all over the country what if those people who drove from all over the country he didn’t get to meet me or didn’t get to shake my hand or whatever if you go to a big huge concert you that’s not happening because there’s thousands of people there there’s no way that that can happen but on a small intimate setting like that whatever whatever happens man whatever experience was meant to be there you you you got to enjoy the intimacy of something small like that you know totally I believe a man well go ahead and share your website man where people can check those books out and check out more of your work and you also have private sessions and mentor ships and a bunch of awesome stuff that you offer on your website as well go ahead and plug that yeah sure that’d be awesome my website is boots coaching our OTS Co ACH ing rotation comm so you can check out go anything on there I got some my implements information on there got some blog post you can find my books on there and also find them on if you wanted to search on Amazon search my name you can find my books and also you can email me yeah I would love to chat with you guys want to talk about anything really anything under the Sun just pseudoscrew me a message matt at roots coaching comm that’s ma TT at roots coaching calm i’d love to hear from you no matter where you come from whoever you are love to talk i think yeah thanks for coming on brother i truly enjoyed it we’ll have to do it again ma’am awesome yeah such a good time brother such a pleasure meeting you our brother thank you i love Shalom peace peace peace Matt Morris ladies and gentlemen good stuff it’s really cool and they make it a lot easier when you have really cool friends and I get to uh interview people who were into my work or who are in my circle and I’ve interviewed a bunch of my personal friends or people who have kind of come on through the podcast and just kind of joined with us or whatever so he he just hit me up just out of the blue and I checked him out he had a bunch of stuff he was doing that was very similar to what I was bringing to the table so we made that happen so really enjoyed this podcast that’s the thing about being authentic being vulnerable with who you are no matter what that is you know they’ll say I remember seeing a status update a couple of weeks ago some buddies went on this rant said you can’t be a Christian and be into astrology doesn’t go together like wanna bet I know some you can’t see you can’t I’ll never tell somebody you can’t that’s the thing or you can’t be a Christian in like mushrooms you can you can’t be a Christian to be in psychedelics as you can you can’t do this you can’t be this and do that yes you can wanna bet I’ll show you I can show you better than I can tell you so being who you are being who you were created to be to have your own personal likes and dislikes we were in discord earlier listening to music with the all my crew here we were in discord if you want to join click the link in the description hit me up we were listening to music and discussing songs and I got to show them some really cool music and was listening sharing some a perfect circle and some tool really powerful music when it comes to spirituality and awareness and that was one of the big things for me is like as being a Christian and being in church I couldn’t be a Christian in like tool I couldn’t be a Christian and listen to knock oh it’s like these two they feel like fought each other one was this and one was that and I had to get to this place of like if I would just go when I was going back and forth in my mind about who am i what am I gonna be what am i pursuing it was either one of the other you couldn’t be a Christian and listen the tool you couldn’t do this you can’t do that you can’t do that and I would go back and forth I’ve just been in the church and I get rid of anything that wasn’t Christian in my home video games whatever and it wouldn’t last long because I would feel like I was selling myself short but this person that God created me to be of these likes and dislikes that I that I have for my tastes and I would feel like I was being someone that that I wasn’t I was wearing a monkey suit playing and act I was being a hypocrite hypocrite a meaning wearing someone who wears a mask in a play and plays multiple characters is deep down I love tulle so the music of tulle and a perfect circle in NACO Trevor Hall medicine for the people like all that stuff played a huge role in me coming to grips with who I was and and having likes and dislikes and being that person that God created me to be you know so that’s at the end of the day that’s what it comes down to for me you’re just being authentic it’s it’s ages you drive people to jealousy they because they want what you have Bible says that you’ll be the envy of all nations the envy your relationships they’ll envy your marriage in for your knowledge your wisdom your freedom why are you free man when I do this when I thought I’d get convicted I’m this people judge me when you got to move past their judgments you got to deal with it you gotta roll with the punches the good the bad the ugly all of it I’m sure reason you got to deal with it all you can’t skip any of it so coming to grips with who you are whatever that is why you’re here like I couldn’t be a Christian in being a float tank so it couldn’t be a Christian and do yoga that was insane missions don’t do yoga I’m like won a bet so I haven’t left Christianity I haven’t left my faith in Christ like I still have a strong faith in Christ he is my strong tower my refuge but as far as leaving religion I’ve left that far behind I’m trying to that’s it it’s a process stages men it’s a long hard road out of that stuff not being triggered and having to be right about everything so understanding that god loves you or who you are and made you that way there is likes and dislikes within you and obviously Joshua repent turn from the things that are killing you but don’t we not gonna justify the things that are killing us and say well God put it on my heart and people said well that’s just an excuse cuz you don’t want to change you don’t want to deal with your sin you’re just gonna be okay with your sin true seeker that’s what you’re saying you want to listen to your secular music and your bad music or whatever and just be okay with it that’s what you’re saying you just want to be okay with it no this stuff that you have to have your own level of discernment you have to have you have to know the will of God for your life and you have to work out your own salvation like the Bible says with fear and trembling and if you’re doing that you’re on the right path I don’t care where you are in life care what setbacks or hang-ups that you faced or you’re currently facing man but you reach down deep through the power of the Holy Spirit and you do what you’re supposed to do you know what you’re called to do if you’re struggling deep feel that struggle within you to be pulled here and pulled there I know I’m talking to somebody because I get the messages in my inbox daily not just one here one there people reach out to me daily it’s because why it’s because I’m being authentic talked about this time and time again the reason the podcast is growing and expanding it’s because being authentic as I’m talking about this stuff if I didn’t talk about it I’ll try to hide it from you but my Adam his sin was not the fact that he ate the apple the sin was like the fact that he tried to hide it from God he may act like we didn’t do this act like you don’t believe that I tried to do that I tried to act like I didn’t believe a certain type of way or it’s being okay with that man come whatever that means coming to terms coming to grips with that that it’s okay well act like I don’t believe in that I used to do that man hey y’all I don’t I don’t I don’t listen to tool no more I just listen nothing but worship music like trust me man it goes deep it goes deep real deep I’ve dealt with it it’s the pendulum effect I have close friends who are dealing with it lashing out their self sabotaging you have to learn you have to learn you have to learn you have to learn we’ve been a part of book burnings we’ve been mocked and made fun of for doing it I’ve broken secular CDs I broke that I ordered the L Co b CD zeitgeist spirit of the age I ordered that CD and I broke it on camera I don’t know if you guys know this mostly you don’t was back in like 2012 I ordered that CD and I broke it and I started a campaign when I cuz I was gonna go I renounced all that stuff and I wanted to go back to Christian rap and I felt like I was leading people astray and all of this kind of stuff you know um so I started a campaign it was called to break your CD campaign acts eighteen eighteen or nineteen nineteen and if people broke their secular CDs and filmed it and I would send them my CDs for free but people were filming it they were throwing away all their CDs and I had friends doing it and I got all kind of video submissions and stuff man and in this cds and uh being real village vigilant about it and many of us have been there been a part of of things like that and then you come back and you said what was i thinking what am i doing and you go back you come back and you go back it’s like a seesaw it’s like a dog chasing its own tail you can get stuck there but um but there’s a light at the end of the tunnel man at the end of the day one of those dogs are gonna win whichever one you’re feeding more whatever you’re leaning towards but I think at the end of the day that the truce remains and you can be a Christian in like this you can be who you are who you created to be whatever that is man everybody’s everybody’s walk is different but there’s still those principles that apply to each and every one of us those principles still apply its universal law its condemnation there’s fear there’s doubt there’s worry self-sufficiency self-sabotage all of this stuff that we have to learn how to deal with and learn what happens when you do that see part of understanding universal law part of understanding your story and and learning from your own Bali’s even learning from the good stuff that’s working you know we talk about that it’s learning from what other people are doing what’s working ok if you do this this gets this kind of results if you do that it gets this kind of results if I lash out and condemn people and and judge people openly on a platform it gets these kind of results and I’m gonna tell you I believe in karma I believe that Jesus said you reap what you sow I believe it in and I don’t Karma’s a little different because I think karma is like lifetimes like you gonna what you do in this life you’re gonna pay for it in another life I think you pay for it now I think that uh you know be not deceived what a man shows he shall also reap that’s Christ whatever you do it comes back to you press down shaken running over it’s gonna come back whatever you’re sowing into the world whether it’s positivity or judgments and when I was going through all that stuff man like I used to protest man I used to preach on the street corners and it wasn’t a message of love it really wasn’t it was Turner burn it was America will be destroyed like it was some really out there stuff and I would judge pastors who were who didn’t agree with our doctrine and we were the ones who had it all figured out yeah much like your church beliefs that they have the only truths as far as speaking in tongues or tithing or whatever doctrinal belief it is many churches are all teaching different things and they all have the exclusivity of the truth within Christianity so uh that’s where I come from and we would call pastors out man I’d do music I mean there’s music you can find what I’m talking about prosperity pimps in creflo dollar and TD jakes and Benny and uh and we’re calling these people out within our music and in teachings and we got we were known for what we were against just like many of you people know you because they know what you’re against not what you’re for in your Bicky we were known for now people you had an exposed ministry you’re out there exposing people brother Wayne exposing people exposing this exposing that exposed to this everybody claims to have that the truth the Karma reaping what I have sown I went through a time where I’m pointing out all these people and calling them this and calling them that where that happened to me when I came out of Christian hip-hop and Christian evangelism people were calling me a devil worshiper it would look into Michael to cesarean or Manley pahala Jordan Maxwell and trace it back to me and they would find all these crazy quotes these people have said and things that they’ve done you believe that you dissed your dad so I had people who looked up to me as a inspiration a street preacher a Christian rapper whatever they look up to me now they have to tell people to stay away from me people who used to honor me were now calling me a devil worshiper and going through this but the same thing that I was pushing out there that I was calling these people these names and you’re a false prophet it came back it came back to me everything that I did came back like a slingshot and it was pretty hard pretty hard to go through but I got a taste of my own medicine guess what I learned not to do that I learned from that if I didn’t learn and nod it suggested I’ll just be bullheaded thinking you or not’ you think you got it all figured out then I probably be still spinning my wheels in that same place but I learned from that and I think that God has a beautiful way of allowing us to go through the wilderness and experience in this stuff firsthand so that we walk in empathy towards others and we truly have a burden for them we’re not just faking it we’re not just acting because it’s religion but we really do care about people and we really do care about the homeless you know how you care about the homeless if you’ve been homeless to care for the orphans and widows if you’ve ever been an orphan or widowed you probably have this burden for those people people who have been through similar things that you’ve been through you’ve been through a lot right you you’re living you’re learning you’re growing you’ve been through a lot you have compassion for a lot of different things that’s why Paul says become all things to all men so that you can win some you’ve sit with that person you’ve been there in there you have that empathy man and that’s what you create that’s what you are known for the things that you’re for not what you’re against but what you’re for love peace joy long-suffering the fruits of the Holy Spirit that’s the fruit that I can tell you’re hanging out with Jesus you’re hanging out because show me your friends I’ll show you your future you begin to act like the people you’re hanging out with you don’t have to fool them you have to trick them oh I’m a Christian man I believe oh really okay well your lifestyle says something different but it’s the fruit that’s there it’s fruit that’s there and you take that into all the world go out into all the world and preach the gospel there’s a quote says uh preach the gospel and uh okay generally use words some of my reformed friends hate that quote because they think that the gospel is only communicated through preaching I think it’s communicated through a life transformed somebody’s life who’s been transformed by the power of Christ by the Holy Spirit by God himself our self itself whatever you think that that power is it’s a father it’s a mother as well it’s a friend it’s a foe whatever it’s whatever wherever you are what you need it to be that’s what God is whatever you need it to be I need it to be a friend right now okay I’ll be your friend I need you to be my refuge okay I’ll be your refuge need you to tell me a joke humor me okay look at that over there check that out look at that guy you know what I’m saying it really is man when it comes down to it at the end of the day it’s a beautiful song and dancing God uses everything God is in everything he’s in your darkness he’s in the light you’re never alone there’s no way you can there’s no where you can go to escape God you go search out the depths of hell he’s right there with you nothing you can do this I’ll never leave you nor forsake you you say I might leave you if I leave you if I leave you or forsake you do this Romans chapter 8 what can separate us from the love of God nothing goes it gets creative it goes through a bunch of naming out things demons angels principalities death disk that that dis that this names all this stuff and I said at the end of the day nothing separate you from the love of God oh the overwhelming never-ending reckless love of God good stuff man if you don’t know it get with us you need prayer you want to know this God we’re talking about in a more intimate way it’s there for you reach out to us we are community we’re building we’re growing we’re not stopping we’re thriving God is good all the time and I love each and every one of you guys we’re here with us listening to this and I hope this episode encouraged you I hope that uh it imparted some type of spiritual gift of something for you wherever you are because these principles work and we’ve been talking this isn’t nothing new we’ve been talking about this for a long time I’m still excited about it but hearing different takes on it how it’s working for other people but we’ve been talking about this for a while so being present being in the moment and I’d send all my music oh good stuff make sure y’all check out all that good stuff follow us on social media hang out with us on discord which is the big thing now we’re all saying we’re just having fun in discord so the link is in the description you can get it on your phone or you can get it on your computer or whatever we do voice chat text chat throughout the day and stuff too so make sure y’all check that out thank you guys for supporting my work if you would like to support this podcast and support my efforts to create conscious media through the podcast and through music and everything that I’m doing we’re stepping it up head on over to patreon patreon comback slash true seeker any level of giving you get a bunch of cool stuff tonight it’s Thursday we’re doing the school of the Mystics at 7 p.m. central and you get access to that by becoming a patron as well so school of the Mystics join us there tonight and each and every Thursday whenever you’re listening to this Shalom Shalom peace peace I love you guys [Music] [Music] that does it for this episode folks to hear more episodes of the truth seeker podcast head over to Jessica calm and if you’re wanting to support the show and get rewards go to our patreon page at forward slash truth seeker [Music]

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